There are a lot of phrases you can hear in the rooms of the 12 steps that are profoundly meaningful. This is a place where people are coming to terms with the wreckage of their past, and the wisdom that ensues when we start to open up to living the good life, the one that God intended, is a profoundly uplifting experience.
One thing I heard a couple years back that has stuck with me since, was someone talking about how they spent most of their lives avoiding responsibility. I can say I could relate to that sentiment. He ended his share about how he now spent his life chasing responsibility.
What does that mean? To me it is doing the thing I know is right and needs to be done regardless of what I want to do. So this past weekend, regardless of what I really wanted to do, I shut down the Community House as I and 3 other ladies went and got Covid tested. The hope was that we would have results in time to decide on running the event, but I knew it was probably going to lead to the event being cancelled. Indeed the results didn't come in until Sunday late afternoon, and although they were all negative, it was a bitter-sweet discovery.
Still, I had been feeling a bit off for a couple days, and then I knew I was sick. In the past, I would have charged through praying for the best. But I realized that it was not just me I had to be concerned about. I was reminded twice that week about members of our recovery community who had died from this deadly disease and it just wasn't sitting with me not to find out for sure.
So four of us went and got tested -negative.
Thank Goodness for Small Blessings.
A reminder to myself and a piece of food for thought, this is not the type of project that depends on a single event, every action and reaction is leading us either closer or father away from loving community. I believe being responsible to the health and well-being of everyone in our community is that one step closer to where we want to be.